Saturday, July 29, 2006

Cheap Re-Heat: Cheap Heat Wrestling (C.H.W.)

With all the stupid shit being posted by Shawn Dandridge, I decided to repost a series of things I used to put in my columns making fun of him and other dumbass wannabe promoters.
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With that being said I want to make an announcement, I am starting my own promotion, Yes, I will be Gene Jackson, Chairman of Cheap Heat Wrestling (C.H.W.) As "Chairman" I would like to announce our first show will be in Huntsville, Alabama on September 18th at 8pm at the Von Braun Civic Center entitled, 'Please Come Watch this Crap' It will feature C.H.W. Superstars: The War Machine, Lo-Ball, The "New" Brooklyn Brawler, Stretch Cunningham, Cocoa Puff, The Amazing White Guys, Former WCW star Lash Leroux.........'s 3rd cousin Flash Leroux, "The Shiznit" Turd Furgeson, Freddie Guerrero, and some guy in a LaParka outfit. PLUS!!!! at intermission an autograph session with Memphis Wrestling Legend, "The Yellow Jacket", and some lucky fan will win a drawing to be the #1 Contender to the CHW title and wrestle in the MAIN EVENT!! Tickets will be $5 per person. (Anyone with a figures inc. title belt we can borrow will get in free) MORE NEWS ON CHW later in this column!!
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CHW Update......The "Chairman" of CHW has announced due to lack of funds and interest by the fans the September 18th show has been moved across town to the parking lot of the BP station on the corner of Bob Wallace Ave and Memorial Parkway, also the belltime has been changed because Flash Leroux's shift at the BP doenst end til 9:45...sorry for the mix up. Also this will now be a free show. CHW fans can get the latest info at www.backyarderswitharing.com/marks.html
More to come

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Another CHW Update....From the office of the "Chairman"(actually it's his bedroom) it has been announced that Flash Leroux has left CHW in protest after a money dispute(he wanted some) So unfortunatly he had to be let go, but that also means another venue change. The September 18th show will now be taking place in Scooter's (of the Amazing White Guys) Carport. We will also be offering $2 to anyone who will attend and go on HollywoodJimmy.com and say that we a had a show. It also looks as though "the Yellow Jacket" will not appear as he demanded WE supply his foam bodysuit and it frankly is just not in the budget, sorry fans. However, in his place we have booked a fat black guy who will either be playing "Mabel" or "Kamala" depending on if we can find a leopard skin skirt between now and then. Stay Tuned!!!!

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Final CHW Update........Well fans it looks as though the September 18th show will have to be cancelled because Scooter's car has a major oil leak leaving the carport unfit for a respectable wrestling show. Sorry for the inconvience, but never fear, My mom will hopefully give me enough money for my birthday to book a "Legend's Show" in West Memphis in October, We already have Rough & Ready confirmed as well a Jimmy Hart impersonator, and an old guy who sits at the park down from my house that looks a lot like "Handsome Jimmy", More news as it becomes available!!

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C.H.W. Update from the "Chairman" Gene Jackson-
Well it looks like the Legends Show isn't going to happen but there is good news CHW fans. My brother bought a camcorder from the local pawn shop at a steal so guess what people, CHW will start tv tapings next month!! We have just finished a deal with local access channels in Memphis, Birmingham, and Huntsville! Our first taping will be October 23 in Birmingham, Alabama. Building to be announced. Time to be announced. Already signed for this show will be all your favorite CHW stars as well as Buff Bagwell's overweight brother, "Fluff" Bagwell, and the "Outlaw's evil twin" D.J. McKay!! Check back soon for more details!!

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And here is your Cheap Heat Wrestling update from "Commisioner" Jackson:

Well CHW fans we can confirm we will be having our first set of CHW TV tapings as my brother managed to get a good deal on a set of 2 hour tapes for his new camcorder. These tapings were going to take place in Corinth, Mississippi but with all the commision nonsense going on we had to book them in Alabama. So our first ever tv tapings will be taking place in historic Muscle Shoals, Alabama in the Freds Parking Lot. We promise that this will be the BIGGEST EVENT EVER!! held in the Fred's Parking Lot and this has been home to numerous church car washes, girl scout cookie sales, and even a petting zoo, but this will blow all those out of the water! The admission will be free although the wrestlers will be bringing cups as they make their way around the ring so we encourage everyone to give them donations because we do not pay the wrestlers for tv tapings. Check out this card:

Main Event
CHW World Heavyweight Title
War Machine vs. Andrew the Giant (6'2 500lbs)

CHW Tag Team Titles
The Amazing White Guys (Chip/Scooter) vs. The "New" Midnight Rock&Roll Express Warriors w/"Precious" Paul Cornette

CHW SuperLightheavyweight Title
"The Junior High Sensation" 'Little' Billy Armstong vs. Rey Mysterio Jr Jr

Hardcore Texas Death Thumbtacks Exploding Glass 9mm on a Pole Match
Buck Nasty vs. Prophet (some of you will know who that is)

Plus more matches and meet former WWE superstar Head (disclaimer: Al Snow will not be appearing)

Also next month we will be running another tv taping in Red Bay, Alabama and if my co-owner can get a title loan on his car we will be bringing in a former World Champion!! This will be the BIGGEST THING EVER IN RED BAY!!!
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