It's been over a month since I posted anything so I thought I should type up something so here goes.
First off thanks to everyone who has emailed me or told me in person that your praying for my mother, it's VERY much appreciated. So far she has taken well to the chemo and the Dr. says you couldn't ask for things to be going any better and I truly believe it's due to all the prayers of everyone.
Due to my mother's illness I found myself unexpectedly in Tupelo last weekend, since there were so many friends and family passing through the hospital room, I decided I would go out for the night so she could get some rest. I called up Neil and decided to go with him to the GTW show in Montpilliar on Saturday night. Well I was glad I did cause we had a lot of fun. There wasn't much of a crowd there and there were only 6 workers there including me and Mr. Sensational. I didn't have my gear with me but still managed to wrestle two matches in my dress shoes and pants I wear to work. Despite that fact I still had a f'n ball. The small crowd was very loud and very into the show and we gave them one as best we could. I'm sure J.D. will tell about it in more detail and hopefully he will go into detail about the brainfart of the promoter putting someone whose NEVER BEEN TRAINED.........AT ALL..... into a MATCH?!?!?! It wasn't quite the clusterfuck you would think, it actually looked very belivable, which considering J.D. was the only one 'working', it was something to see.
Well, I'll post something else soon. I typed a bunch of stuff awhile back about Wrestlemania and TNA but by the time I went to finish it, it was kinda outdated.
Check back soon.
Gene
Sunday, March 26, 2006
Friday, February 17, 2006
Interesting Article by Dr. Tom Prichard
The Doctor's Note: What's Wrong With The Business? By Dr. Tom Prichard
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One of the biggest questions or topics of conversation about pro wrestling these days is “what’s wrong with the business?”
I don’t think there’s one clear cut answer. I have my own ideas about what is wrong but my opinions aren’t always filled with solutions, therefore they come off more as complaining rather than explaining at times.
Number one, we can’t put the genie back in the bottle. Why would the new generation of fans want to watch sports entertainment or pro wrestling on the independent scene these days? I ask myself that question every time I attend an indy show. What are these people doing here? Well, most are family and friends. Others are just looking for a night out and some decent entertainment.
Too many independent guys flat out don’t get it. I hear stories all the time about “I deserve a belt, I’m gonna have to talk to the promoter about paying me more than $10!” $10?! Some of these guys should be paying the PROMOTER for letting them be on the card that night! Everybody’s a Superstar! They can’t be beat in front of 20-30 people because it will kill their “heat.” GIVE ME A BREAK! PAALEEZE!!!
It really was a lot harder to break in 20 years ago. These days a wrestling school pops up and some guy who knew a guy who knew a lady who used to “date” a guy who ushered at the matches at the high school and bought one of the wrestlers a coke one time is now a certified trainer!!! Then his “students” truly believe they are superstars who can demand top dollar and should be treated with respect because they wrestled in a National Guard Armory in front of 17 people twice a year! Anybody who has been in an independent dressing room in the last year in Tennessee will attest to this. That is if they have been anywhere and made a living in the wrestling business...EVER. Not just wrestled on the weekends and still live with their mom or grandmas. But actually got off their skinny (or fat), lazy asses and traveled the country and took any and every booking there was to take REGARDLESS of what the payoff was, JUST to get their name and reputation known.
I come across both kinds. The ones who ask me what they should do to get to the next level and then follow through. Then there are more of the ones who talk a great game but wake up at 11 am, eat biscuits and gravy, watch Jerry Springer and Cheaters and then meander into the gym 2-3 days a week. They talk about how bad they want it and how they are “gonna talk to the promoter because I’m gettin’ screwed” bullshit. It’s the same old story of you keep doing what you’re doing and you’re going to keep getting what you’re getting.
Attitude. Respect. Determination. Ambition. You can’t just wish and hope you’re going to get somewhere. Ring of Honor. Jim Kettner’s Super 8. TNA. Japan. East Coast. West Coast. Google. Network. Make contacts. Do you want to make it to the “show?” WWE? Is that what you REALLY want? Once you get there, then what? More importantly, what exactly is your plan to get there? Who knows about you outside those 20 people that watch you at the flea market or armory? Again, who really cares past those same people who watch you and then post on that company’s message boards? Really, think about it. Wish in one hand and shit in another.
The competition is extreme. Why would those who make decisions in other, higher profile companies want to employ some punk with a disrespectful, know-it-all attitude? They wouldn’t. I’ve stuck my neck out a few times only to kicked in the head. These real respectful, humble guys turn out to be prima donna pricks that have totally shit on their opportunity. That caused me to be a little more particular in who I recommend or endorse. Especially for overseas tours.
Others I have recommended or helped have really made the most of their opportunity. And they have remained humble, ambitious and real. Oh yeah. Real.
Too many guys on the indy level are pretending to be something they’re not. Hell, even on the larger stage there’s people trying to be something they’re not and that translates into nobody believing in the product on all levels.
What’s wrong with things today in my opinion is what was right (and wrong) with things years ago. After reading the Superstar Billy Graham book, it was obvious there was a lot of wrong going on years ago. But that’s what made guys like Graham so special. They were outlaws. They were dangerous. They were real. What you saw was what you got. Crazy, insane and as real as it got.
I don’t recommend the lifestyle that Superstar and many of his peers lived by back then. But I do remember watching and following the careers of him and his counterparts and when they walked into the arena they were special. They carried themselves as such and looked every bit the part of wrestlers. They didn’t look like the paper boy.
Pro wrestling has never been everyone’s cup of tea. I liked it better that way. It appealed to real fans, but not the masses. There’s more money on the main stage no doubt. Once cable TV came along it was inevitable that the business couldn’t be contained. It was good and bad on many levels. The good was it made a few guys rich. The bad is it made a lot of guys think they could buy a pair of boots and trunks and just be “rasslers.”
I don’t like everything the business has become but I understand it and why it has to be this way. It’s a big corporation and corporate people are running things. If you want to be in the game, you’ve got to play the game. Then again if you just want to play pretend, then there’s a stage for that too.
Tuesday, February 14, 2006
A lot to talk about (and with no help from David Burcham)
I wanna talk about something that's been on my mind lately but first let's cover a few things going on in wrestling right now.
Christian Cage wins the NWA World Title!
While I do feel the belt needed to be off of Jarrett (we'll see for how long though) I think they may have jumped the gun on putting the belt on Christian, they could have let him chase it for a while to make the win more meaningful but I guess change is good.
Bret Hart agrees to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame
Well Ol' Bret continues to sell out little by little to Vince. A couple years ago he said he would NEVER have anything to do with Vince or WWE again but the idea of his good name being tarnished on a dvd (ala Ultimate Warrior) was too much for him to bare so he came back and not only did the dvd but gave a few 'photo ops' shaking hands with McMahon. Now he's decided to come be inducted into the Hall of Fame, which I think is great but if he's gonna do this kinda stuff then he needs to lay off the 'WWE is evil' shit in his interviews and fan q&a's. I'm sure it's only a matter of time(if not at WrestleMania 22) that McMahon will have him talked into doing the in-ring confrontation he's been trying to sell him on for a while now.
Speaking of Wrestlemania, I have to say I'm disappointed. While the WWE has sucked pretty bad for a few years now they've always been able to pull something out of there ass for Wrestlemania that gets you interested. This year they really don't seem to have anything that's gonna be a can't miss match. The shit with HBK/Vince/Shane is just coming off like a desperate thrown together angle for a meaningless Wrestemania match, which it probably is since rumor is Shawn Michaels wanted to wrestle the Rock at Wrestlemania but Rock turned it down because he legit dislikes Shawn for being such a prick when he first broke in. We'll see, maybe they will come up with something.
Axeman has heat!!!
Damn man, what's with all the Axeman haters on the message board? They've been roasting him for weeks now. Give the guy a break, he writes a good column, if you don't like it don't read it. Now as for the people who are taking him to task on claiming he worked for World Class in the eighties, can you really blame them? If you go on record making a claim like that then you should be prepared to back it up. As someone who has hundreds of hours of World Class Wrestling on tape myself I would love to know the details of Axeman's stint there, so come on Axe, show the proof and shut them up already.
Here's an Example of what's wrong with wrestling today
Look at this, it 's ending soon so I hope the link will still work but some dumbass indy promoter has Ebay auctions to be a manager on his show. You can pay $200 bucks to manage Raven, Abyss, or the New Age Outlaws, or they can pay $125 to be the ring announcer.
Here's a link:
Click here to become a wrestling manager!
"Hey Gene, Rhino took your ring name."
Well, I recieved several emails from people informing me that TNA has started calling Rhino, "The War Machine" and have even trademarked the name for wrestling. I guess this is supposed to upset me but I don't really care. I stole the name from when Ray Traylor used it in the WarGames in 1987. As for it being trademarked I really don't think I would get caught using it on some show in Mississippi or Alabama in front of 30 people but to make people happy I will drop it all the same. I have no intention of wrestling anytime soon if at all so it's really not a big deal. I've been working on some more stand up material and plan to go back to the Comedy Club in Birmingham in March or April.
=================================================================
Okay, like I mentioned at the beginning. Here's what's been bugging me. It really sucks that wrestling fans of the present and future will never know what wrestling really is (or was). I mean think about it, fans who have only been watching 8-10 years don't really know what wrestling was really all about. It really hit me recently when I was talking to a young guy at work(17 or so) and came to realize that his idea of "old school" wrestling is the nWo. He said he started watching wrestling around '97. He says he watches RAW and wonders what the big deal about Ric Flair is? Think about it, he's right. If you didn't know Flair's history and have only seen him in the past few years as Triple H's bitch you would wonder that too. Or what about the fans who hear people talk about how great Memphis Wrestling was and it's rich history but all they've seen is fucking Corey Maclin working the main angles for the past three years. (Honestly, Koko B. Ware vs. Corey FUCKIN' Maclin in a Cage!?!? and they wonder why they can't draw in Memphis anymore) Back to the point, these fans have been brought up on an entirely different "wrestling" than most of us did and the bad thing is, it can never be fixed. You can't bring back kayfabe. You can't slow the matches back down and make them mean something, you can't put the real emotion back that used to be there. Now most could care less who wins or loses they just want to see if they can spot how many times someone 'fucked up' or 'blows a spot'. It's all about how many moves someone can perform rather than any emotional attachment. People have been told it's fake to the point that no one wants to believe anything is EVER real because God forbid they be "worked". For Christ's sake there are people on messages boards who think Eddie Guerrero's death is a work and he's gonna do a run in at Wrestlemania. (although who can blame them since his name has been thrown around on tv more in the past few weeks than some of the midcarders currently still there.) So much was done during the 'Monday Night Wars' that gave them short term ratings boosts but have killed wrestling in the long run. Plus it's obvious how much real wrestling fans long for the old days of wrestling, that's why the sales of the dvd's with old footage are doing so well, and their Classic Wrestling Figures are such hot items, fans want to cling to that last memory of the sport they once loved. As for the young people you can watch the dvds but you still can't understand or appreciate how it used to be, just watching random matches most find them boring when compared to todays X-Division type stuff. Alot of the matches from the past don't hold up as well without seeing the monthes of buildup that led to them. That's another thing, most angles have a FOUR WEEK build then a PPV match and then it's on to the next one. I guess there really was no purpose to this other than to vent and see if I get any feedback from people who feel the same way. So if you agree or have an opposing view, I would love to hear it. Seriously. genejackson@charter.net
You know some jerkoff on the message board made some comment, something to the effect of. "Gene Jackson is an ass, he acts like he know's the business when he doesn't even work any shows." Not exact, but it was something to that effect. In response to that I will say, that yes I am an ass, no argument there. However, I do know something about the "business" and I've got news for you. Most of the guys who work shows every weekend don't have a damn clue about the business. I think most people who have read my columns for a while will tell you that while I'm not a good wrestler by any stretch, I do however know and understand the business. Not from working but from studying it my entire life. Since I was a small child I have watched and read everything I could get my hands that had anything to do with wrestling. Not just watched it as a fan, but studied it. What people do in the ring, how people react, why they react that way. You don't have to get in the ring to "know the business". Dave Meltzer has never worked a match, but he "knows the business". Bill Apter is not a worker, but he "knows the business". So while you may be right that I'm an ass, and no I don't wrestle much these days, I do understand the business and what it's about, which more than I can say for a whole of people. (and the sad thing is, they don't even know)
Thanks for Reading.
GENE
Christian Cage wins the NWA World Title!
While I do feel the belt needed to be off of Jarrett (we'll see for how long though) I think they may have jumped the gun on putting the belt on Christian, they could have let him chase it for a while to make the win more meaningful but I guess change is good.
Bret Hart agrees to be inducted into the WWE Hall of Fame
Well Ol' Bret continues to sell out little by little to Vince. A couple years ago he said he would NEVER have anything to do with Vince or WWE again but the idea of his good name being tarnished on a dvd (ala Ultimate Warrior) was too much for him to bare so he came back and not only did the dvd but gave a few 'photo ops' shaking hands with McMahon. Now he's decided to come be inducted into the Hall of Fame, which I think is great but if he's gonna do this kinda stuff then he needs to lay off the 'WWE is evil' shit in his interviews and fan q&a's. I'm sure it's only a matter of time(if not at WrestleMania 22) that McMahon will have him talked into doing the in-ring confrontation he's been trying to sell him on for a while now.
Speaking of Wrestlemania, I have to say I'm disappointed. While the WWE has sucked pretty bad for a few years now they've always been able to pull something out of there ass for Wrestlemania that gets you interested. This year they really don't seem to have anything that's gonna be a can't miss match. The shit with HBK/Vince/Shane is just coming off like a desperate thrown together angle for a meaningless Wrestemania match, which it probably is since rumor is Shawn Michaels wanted to wrestle the Rock at Wrestlemania but Rock turned it down because he legit dislikes Shawn for being such a prick when he first broke in. We'll see, maybe they will come up with something.
Axeman has heat!!!
Damn man, what's with all the Axeman haters on the message board? They've been roasting him for weeks now. Give the guy a break, he writes a good column, if you don't like it don't read it. Now as for the people who are taking him to task on claiming he worked for World Class in the eighties, can you really blame them? If you go on record making a claim like that then you should be prepared to back it up. As someone who has hundreds of hours of World Class Wrestling on tape myself I would love to know the details of Axeman's stint there, so come on Axe, show the proof and shut them up already.
Here's an Example of what's wrong with wrestling today
Look at this, it 's ending soon so I hope the link will still work but some dumbass indy promoter has Ebay auctions to be a manager on his show. You can pay $200 bucks to manage Raven, Abyss, or the New Age Outlaws, or they can pay $125 to be the ring announcer.
Here's a link:
Click here to become a wrestling manager!
"Hey Gene, Rhino took your ring name."
Well, I recieved several emails from people informing me that TNA has started calling Rhino, "The War Machine" and have even trademarked the name for wrestling. I guess this is supposed to upset me but I don't really care. I stole the name from when Ray Traylor used it in the WarGames in 1987. As for it being trademarked I really don't think I would get caught using it on some show in Mississippi or Alabama in front of 30 people but to make people happy I will drop it all the same. I have no intention of wrestling anytime soon if at all so it's really not a big deal. I've been working on some more stand up material and plan to go back to the Comedy Club in Birmingham in March or April.
=================================================================
Okay, like I mentioned at the beginning. Here's what's been bugging me. It really sucks that wrestling fans of the present and future will never know what wrestling really is (or was). I mean think about it, fans who have only been watching 8-10 years don't really know what wrestling was really all about. It really hit me recently when I was talking to a young guy at work(17 or so) and came to realize that his idea of "old school" wrestling is the nWo. He said he started watching wrestling around '97. He says he watches RAW and wonders what the big deal about Ric Flair is? Think about it, he's right. If you didn't know Flair's history and have only seen him in the past few years as Triple H's bitch you would wonder that too. Or what about the fans who hear people talk about how great Memphis Wrestling was and it's rich history but all they've seen is fucking Corey Maclin working the main angles for the past three years. (Honestly, Koko B. Ware vs. Corey FUCKIN' Maclin in a Cage!?!? and they wonder why they can't draw in Memphis anymore) Back to the point, these fans have been brought up on an entirely different "wrestling" than most of us did and the bad thing is, it can never be fixed. You can't bring back kayfabe. You can't slow the matches back down and make them mean something, you can't put the real emotion back that used to be there. Now most could care less who wins or loses they just want to see if they can spot how many times someone 'fucked up' or 'blows a spot'. It's all about how many moves someone can perform rather than any emotional attachment. People have been told it's fake to the point that no one wants to believe anything is EVER real because God forbid they be "worked". For Christ's sake there are people on messages boards who think Eddie Guerrero's death is a work and he's gonna do a run in at Wrestlemania. (although who can blame them since his name has been thrown around on tv more in the past few weeks than some of the midcarders currently still there.) So much was done during the 'Monday Night Wars' that gave them short term ratings boosts but have killed wrestling in the long run. Plus it's obvious how much real wrestling fans long for the old days of wrestling, that's why the sales of the dvd's with old footage are doing so well, and their Classic Wrestling Figures are such hot items, fans want to cling to that last memory of the sport they once loved. As for the young people you can watch the dvds but you still can't understand or appreciate how it used to be, just watching random matches most find them boring when compared to todays X-Division type stuff. Alot of the matches from the past don't hold up as well without seeing the monthes of buildup that led to them. That's another thing, most angles have a FOUR WEEK build then a PPV match and then it's on to the next one. I guess there really was no purpose to this other than to vent and see if I get any feedback from people who feel the same way. So if you agree or have an opposing view, I would love to hear it. Seriously. genejackson@charter.net
You know some jerkoff on the message board made some comment, something to the effect of. "Gene Jackson is an ass, he acts like he know's the business when he doesn't even work any shows." Not exact, but it was something to that effect. In response to that I will say, that yes I am an ass, no argument there. However, I do know something about the "business" and I've got news for you. Most of the guys who work shows every weekend don't have a damn clue about the business. I think most people who have read my columns for a while will tell you that while I'm not a good wrestler by any stretch, I do however know and understand the business. Not from working but from studying it my entire life. Since I was a small child I have watched and read everything I could get my hands that had anything to do with wrestling. Not just watched it as a fan, but studied it. What people do in the ring, how people react, why they react that way. You don't have to get in the ring to "know the business". Dave Meltzer has never worked a match, but he "knows the business". Bill Apter is not a worker, but he "knows the business". So while you may be right that I'm an ass, and no I don't wrestle much these days, I do understand the business and what it's about, which more than I can say for a whole of people. (and the sad thing is, they don't even know)
Thanks for Reading.
GENE
Monday, January 16, 2006
2005 Year End Awards and more!
Well, it's a little late but I've finally got the yearend awards ready to post, had to finish counting the ballots. Anyways, as is a 'Cheap Heat' tradition the couple of times a year that David Burcham updates 'Rants & Raves' I give my response be it positive or negative. Well this time is no different and I will be posting a few things after the awards in response such as the number 12 quote from Eddie Guerrero when he got to heaven that Burcham failed to mention. As well as my own "Top 11 Reasons David Burcham should lay off of Samoa Joe." But first, the all important 'Cheap Heat YearEnd Awards.'
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The Serious Awards
2005 Wrestler of the Year- Shawn Michaels
(Michaels showed why he is the "showstopper" once again this year stealing the show at both of the year's big PPV event's, first at Wrestlemania in a true classic with Kurt Angle, and then carrying the poor old Hulkster through a Main Event match at SummerSlam. He also showed that the 'HBK' of old is still around with his pre and post SummerSlam promos on Hogan. Hopefully the old Shawn will be back on tv for good someday)
2005 Tag Team of the Year- America's Most Wanted
(With WWE only having one team that survived all year long (MNM), AMW have been establishing themselves as the top team in TNA since the early days of the promotion. There recent heel turn went well and they seem to have a secure place on the roster and have done well in their battles with 'Team 3-D'.)
2005 Match of the Year- A.J. Styles vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Samoa Joe- X Division Title Match- TNA Sacrifice PPV
(I'm generally not a fan of triangle matches and while this one sort of fell apart towards the end, it more than made up for it in the beginning and middle. This match defines everything positive that TNA has going for it, while Jarrett defines the other end of the spectrum.
2005 Feud of the Year- Johnny Jeter vs. Matt Cappotelli- Ohio Valley Wrestling
(Although I'm sure many people reading this haven't seen a lot of OVW, Paul Heyman took an unfortunatlely timed injury to Cappotelli and turned it into their biggest angle of the year. Making Jeter a heel champion with a TON of heat and people chomping at the bit to see Matt return to get revenge on his former friend and partner. The match finally happened and was incredibly booked with a wall of refs to keep them seperated(which was awesome, I hate when a "grudge match" is built for months only to have these "hated rivals" now suddenly circle each other in the ring and slowly lock up) If you get a chance you really should try to get some tapes of OVW, they have some great things going on there.
2005 PPV of the Year- WWE SummerSlam 2005
(With Wrestlemania really only having one real money match, Angle vs. HBK. Sorry JBL vs Cena and HHH vs. Batista just didn't do anything for me. The big event of the year was SummerSlam. Now even though it may not have delivered with all it could have, you still had to wonder going in, "Will Hardy and Edge be able to make this look like a real fight?" "Will Hogan actually do the job for HBK, Will it be Montreal revisited for the 500th time?" "Will Eddie Guerrero get custody of Rey Mysterio's son????" Ok maybe not the last one, but everyone had to wonder who was gonna do the job when two of the biggest egos in wrestling clashed, and I must say I was sorta shocked at the result.
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The Less Serious Awards (Yet Prestigious Nonetheless)
Douchebag of the Year- David Andrews
Barbara Walters' Interviewer of the Year- Axeman
(It's funny, it doesn't matter if Axeman interviewed the Rock, the 2nd question would be "What do you think of Neil Taylor and Leslie Jones?" the third question would be "Do you think the IWF 'made you'?"
Best Quarterly Wrestling Column- David Burcham
Virgil Runnels' Booker of the Year Award- J.D. McKay
Dave Meltzer Insider Column of the Year- J.D. McKay
Most Likely to get caught spanking it to a AJ Styles video- David Andrews
Larry the Cable Guy "Harder to understand than a hairlip ordering biggie frys"- Cannon's Fire
Quote of the Year- (KoKo B. Ware to David Burcham at the show in Okolona in December) "Why didn't you get up in the ring with us and dance, we could have got you laid tonight."
Virgil Runnels Midnight Rider "'Day'll never know babee" Masked Gimmick of the Year- Death Wish
Most likely to get punched in the nugget by Gene Jackson- David Andrews
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Ok, with that out of the way we move onto the latest 'Rants & Raves', you know the internet column written by an internet mark who ironically refers to other internet writers as internet marks!?!? Anywho, apparently someone at TNA has done something to piss him off as he seemingly has NOTHING good to say about them. I really don't understand why, God knows someone needs to offer an alternative to the horrible SHIT that WWE has been providing in recent years. While I admit Jeff Jarrett is nothing to write home about, you can't deny that guys like Christopher Daniels, AJ Styles, Petey Williams, Abyss, Sabu, Raven, and countless others have put on matches that put WWE to complete shame. As well as offering a place for people like Christian who WWE seemingly had not intention of ever pushing to have a place where he can show his talents outside the confines of the WWE's sitcom script writers. But besides disliking TNA in general apparently Samoa Joe kicked Burcham's dog or something. I don't understand what his beef with Samoa Joe is. I mean if he watched alot of these ROH matches that all these "internet marks" "rubs one off to" he would see the guy can actually work unlike half the guys on Raw and Smackdown. As for your "Tazz in the WWE" analogy well I guess time will tell on that one, but I don't see what your issue is with him, the only things you offered were the fact he wrestles in the X-Division and the fact you don't like his name. I'm sure he will have some wise ass retort to this about me being one of the ones who "rubs one of" I just think if your gonna trash somebody you should have a better line of reasoning. It would be like me coming on here saying, "I'm sick of everyone talking about how great Shawn Micahaels is because his ring music is gay, and I think the superkick is a lame finisher." So to that end I give you the..........
Top 11 Reasons why David Burcham should lay off Samoa Joe
11. Hey, at least he's not Heidenreich.
10. Sure, it's a dumb name but all the "cool" ones like "Olly by Golly" were already taken.
9. Hey at least he's not David Andrews
8. At least he's not another grass skirt wearin' "Wild Samoan"
7. Hey, at least he's not Chris Masters
6. He isn't a thong wearin' dancin' Samoan
5. Hey at least he's not Simon Dean (btw, great wrestler, shitty gimmick)
4. Sure he can't put on a wrestling clinic like "Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James" but hey, who can? (personally I found the 1.5 seconds of Lita's tit to be more entertaining)
3. TNA won't try to make a "movie" with him in the lead.
(TNA films presents Samoa Joe as a cop who has to go undercover and disguise himself as a drug dealer's mother in "Joe Mama".)
2. He doesn't eat worms and break clocks over his head.
And the #1 Reason David Burcham should lay off Samoa Joe
At least he's not KERWIN WHITE! (or Kevin White for that matter!)
==================================================
I want to thank David Burcham for always providing me material whenever he decides to get off his ass and write a column and before I leave, as promised the 12th thing Eddie Guerrero said when he got to heaven,
"Hey Kerry, you should hear what that asshole David Burcham said about you in his "Rants & Raves" column, Esse."
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The Serious Awards
2005 Wrestler of the Year- Shawn Michaels
(Michaels showed why he is the "showstopper" once again this year stealing the show at both of the year's big PPV event's, first at Wrestlemania in a true classic with Kurt Angle, and then carrying the poor old Hulkster through a Main Event match at SummerSlam. He also showed that the 'HBK' of old is still around with his pre and post SummerSlam promos on Hogan. Hopefully the old Shawn will be back on tv for good someday)
2005 Tag Team of the Year- America's Most Wanted
(With WWE only having one team that survived all year long (MNM), AMW have been establishing themselves as the top team in TNA since the early days of the promotion. There recent heel turn went well and they seem to have a secure place on the roster and have done well in their battles with 'Team 3-D'.)
2005 Match of the Year- A.J. Styles vs. Christopher Daniels vs. Samoa Joe- X Division Title Match- TNA Sacrifice PPV
(I'm generally not a fan of triangle matches and while this one sort of fell apart towards the end, it more than made up for it in the beginning and middle. This match defines everything positive that TNA has going for it, while Jarrett defines the other end of the spectrum.
2005 Feud of the Year- Johnny Jeter vs. Matt Cappotelli- Ohio Valley Wrestling
(Although I'm sure many people reading this haven't seen a lot of OVW, Paul Heyman took an unfortunatlely timed injury to Cappotelli and turned it into their biggest angle of the year. Making Jeter a heel champion with a TON of heat and people chomping at the bit to see Matt return to get revenge on his former friend and partner. The match finally happened and was incredibly booked with a wall of refs to keep them seperated(which was awesome, I hate when a "grudge match" is built for months only to have these "hated rivals" now suddenly circle each other in the ring and slowly lock up) If you get a chance you really should try to get some tapes of OVW, they have some great things going on there.
2005 PPV of the Year- WWE SummerSlam 2005
(With Wrestlemania really only having one real money match, Angle vs. HBK. Sorry JBL vs Cena and HHH vs. Batista just didn't do anything for me. The big event of the year was SummerSlam. Now even though it may not have delivered with all it could have, you still had to wonder going in, "Will Hardy and Edge be able to make this look like a real fight?" "Will Hogan actually do the job for HBK, Will it be Montreal revisited for the 500th time?" "Will Eddie Guerrero get custody of Rey Mysterio's son????" Ok maybe not the last one, but everyone had to wonder who was gonna do the job when two of the biggest egos in wrestling clashed, and I must say I was sorta shocked at the result.
====================================================================
The Less Serious Awards (Yet Prestigious Nonetheless)
Douchebag of the Year- David Andrews
Barbara Walters' Interviewer of the Year- Axeman
(It's funny, it doesn't matter if Axeman interviewed the Rock, the 2nd question would be "What do you think of Neil Taylor and Leslie Jones?" the third question would be "Do you think the IWF 'made you'?"
Best Quarterly Wrestling Column- David Burcham
Virgil Runnels' Booker of the Year Award- J.D. McKay
Dave Meltzer Insider Column of the Year- J.D. McKay
Most Likely to get caught spanking it to a AJ Styles video- David Andrews
Larry the Cable Guy "Harder to understand than a hairlip ordering biggie frys"- Cannon's Fire
Quote of the Year- (KoKo B. Ware to David Burcham at the show in Okolona in December) "Why didn't you get up in the ring with us and dance, we could have got you laid tonight."
Virgil Runnels Midnight Rider "'Day'll never know babee" Masked Gimmick of the Year- Death Wish
Most likely to get punched in the nugget by Gene Jackson- David Andrews
===================================================================
Ok, with that out of the way we move onto the latest 'Rants & Raves', you know the internet column written by an internet mark who ironically refers to other internet writers as internet marks!?!? Anywho, apparently someone at TNA has done something to piss him off as he seemingly has NOTHING good to say about them. I really don't understand why, God knows someone needs to offer an alternative to the horrible SHIT that WWE has been providing in recent years. While I admit Jeff Jarrett is nothing to write home about, you can't deny that guys like Christopher Daniels, AJ Styles, Petey Williams, Abyss, Sabu, Raven, and countless others have put on matches that put WWE to complete shame. As well as offering a place for people like Christian who WWE seemingly had not intention of ever pushing to have a place where he can show his talents outside the confines of the WWE's sitcom script writers. But besides disliking TNA in general apparently Samoa Joe kicked Burcham's dog or something. I don't understand what his beef with Samoa Joe is. I mean if he watched alot of these ROH matches that all these "internet marks" "rubs one off to" he would see the guy can actually work unlike half the guys on Raw and Smackdown. As for your "Tazz in the WWE" analogy well I guess time will tell on that one, but I don't see what your issue is with him, the only things you offered were the fact he wrestles in the X-Division and the fact you don't like his name. I'm sure he will have some wise ass retort to this about me being one of the ones who "rubs one of" I just think if your gonna trash somebody you should have a better line of reasoning. It would be like me coming on here saying, "I'm sick of everyone talking about how great Shawn Micahaels is because his ring music is gay, and I think the superkick is a lame finisher." So to that end I give you the..........
Top 11 Reasons why David Burcham should lay off Samoa Joe
11. Hey, at least he's not Heidenreich.
10. Sure, it's a dumb name but all the "cool" ones like "Olly by Golly" were already taken.
9. Hey at least he's not David Andrews
8. At least he's not another grass skirt wearin' "Wild Samoan"
7. Hey, at least he's not Chris Masters
6. He isn't a thong wearin' dancin' Samoan
5. Hey at least he's not Simon Dean (btw, great wrestler, shitty gimmick)
4. Sure he can't put on a wrestling clinic like "Trish Stratus vs. Mickie James" but hey, who can? (personally I found the 1.5 seconds of Lita's tit to be more entertaining)
3. TNA won't try to make a "movie" with him in the lead.
(TNA films presents Samoa Joe as a cop who has to go undercover and disguise himself as a drug dealer's mother in "Joe Mama".)
2. He doesn't eat worms and break clocks over his head.
And the #1 Reason David Burcham should lay off Samoa Joe
At least he's not KERWIN WHITE! (or Kevin White for that matter!)
==================================================
I want to thank David Burcham for always providing me material whenever he decides to get off his ass and write a column and before I leave, as promised the 12th thing Eddie Guerrero said when he got to heaven,
"Hey Kerry, you should hear what that asshole David Burcham said about you in his "Rants & Raves" column, Esse."
Saturday, December 31, 2005
Year End Awards Coming on Tuesday
Well Axeman isn't the only writer bombarded with "fan mail". (wink, wink). Thousands upon thousands of Cheap Heat readers have sent in their votes and on Tuesday I will be posting the 'First annual Cheap Heat Year End Awards'. There will be all sorts of awards given out, so be sure to check back to see if you favorite wrestler will be bestowed the honor of an award from the the THOUSANDS of Cheap Heat readers who voted!
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Catching Up....
Well I went through a laundry list of things I wanted to cover in detail but I don't know if I'll have as much time as I originally hoped but I'll try to cover everything. First off......
SGWA- You know I was gonna go on a whole big rant but you know what, fuck it. Lawler was there, they had a big house, good for them. Yeah, they shit on thier loyal guys, before (Neil and Rocker) and after (their regular workers who didn't get paid) but apparently someone clued them in that it takes workers to have a show so now they've decided to make things right. Well good for them, hope everything turns out peachy for them and maybe they can book another big name and draw another big house someday. I will commend them though on at least admitting they tried to get XOW shut down, as gutless of a pussy move as that was at least they owned up to it. Also VERY shocked to see this column is STILL linked on their site, cool with me. After this post I'm pretty much done ragging on them.
Payoffs- or as J.D. would say, "Pizzay" (it's funny before someone clued me in on the carny talk, I just thought J.D. was a closet fan of Snoop Dog or something). Anyways, this was a hot topic last week with many people chiming in, some who should and some who had no business in the matter one way or the other. Well here's my 2 cents for what it is worth. Yes, I think it is ok for guys just starting out(green guys) to not get paid for a while til they pay their dues and learn how to work (at least partially). Yes, I know there are experienced guys who are willing to work just for the "love of the business" but they shouldn't have to. Yes, I know in most cases promoters don't usually make a lot of money but these guys are still traveling to the shows, they are still getting in there and working and putting their bodies at risk and they deserve to be paid a reasonable amount. It's like that in any other BUSINESS, If McDonalds has a slow week they can't tell all their employees at the end of week, "sorry we didn't make anything this week, we'll try to get you next time". That's bullshit. Also the reason a lot of the towns don't draw anymore is because a lot of cheap ass promoters would rather use green guys who will work for free and set their ring up for them, rather than pay guys who can work. They think they are getting ahead but they just run off the good workers and kill the crowds. If you invest the money in your show to use guys who can work it will pay off in the long run. As for the amount, well that's between the promoter and the wrestler, if they can agree on an amount then that should be fine, and like J.D. said, if you don't get a guarantee and agree to work off the door then your stuck taking what they give you, get a guarantee next time or go somewhere else but don't go on the internet and bitch about it. These guys who piss and moan about "ABCD wrestling doesn't pay me" and sign it 'ABCD Worker'. You know why they don't pay you, cause you put up with it, if everyone left and their were only two or three of them left to work then I guess they'd have to start paying you, and if not go get booked on one of the 2o other wrestling shows in the area. The point is, you don't show up, drop your pants and bend over ,then cry cause you got fucked. Next topic....
Golden Triangle Wrestling- Neil and I decided to go to the GTW show in Montpeliar(sp?) and I have to say, I had a helluva a good time. As J.D. said he was booking the show(kinda) and it was fun to sit in the dressing room and cut up with him and watch him try to book the card and then have the promoter come change it every 5 minutes. It was also fun ragging him about the fact HE was the booker and he was in the opener for the GTW title, and in the main event for the GTW Tag Titles, LOL!! I know, I know it was the promoter's idea. Still funny though. And as he mentioned, it was the grand return of Southern Destruction, not quite what we had planned it to be in the weeks leading up to the 26th, but interesting none the less. We wrestled Mitch Toretta (sp?) and David Andrews. I have to say I was skeptical going in as we were being told that Andrews was over in the babyface dressing room saying he should be the main event and should be going over, and not at all kidding by the way. (there was 50 people there, who gives a shit?) Anyways, then I was told that this Mitch kid was trained by 'Cowboy' Jim, who ain't exactly Dory Funk Jr. by any stretch of the imagination. Well we get out there and David Andrews (in his AJ Styles getup) is still the shits just like the last time I saw him during his claim to fame IWF tenure as Jason Envy. He fucked up everything Neil tried to call for him so we pretty much wrote him off about 2 minutes into it. Mitch Toretta however, albeit green, was good to work with and listened so we kept him in for most of the match, that is untill the clusterfuck of a finish where Andrews fucked up a piledriver nine ways from Sunday. Anyway, we get the pin and go in the back and later find out he was running his mouth off in the other dressing room. I swear, that little bitch better hope I never come across him somewhere at a show, which shouldn't be a problem cause anyone would be retarded to book him, he sucks ass AND he has an ego. Next topic.....
Wrestling in Okolona on December 17th- Looking forward to this show, looks like a great card at the Armory. Besides working, I'm looking foward to seeing a lot of guys that night that I haven't seen in quite some time. Should be a great show. Hope there's a good turnout.
Well that's all for now, in my next update I'll try to talk about some of the other stuff going on in wrestling. As always, thanks for reading and tell a friend.
GENE
SGWA- You know I was gonna go on a whole big rant but you know what, fuck it. Lawler was there, they had a big house, good for them. Yeah, they shit on thier loyal guys, before (Neil and Rocker) and after (their regular workers who didn't get paid) but apparently someone clued them in that it takes workers to have a show so now they've decided to make things right. Well good for them, hope everything turns out peachy for them and maybe they can book another big name and draw another big house someday. I will commend them though on at least admitting they tried to get XOW shut down, as gutless of a pussy move as that was at least they owned up to it. Also VERY shocked to see this column is STILL linked on their site, cool with me. After this post I'm pretty much done ragging on them.
Payoffs- or as J.D. would say, "Pizzay" (it's funny before someone clued me in on the carny talk, I just thought J.D. was a closet fan of Snoop Dog or something). Anyways, this was a hot topic last week with many people chiming in, some who should and some who had no business in the matter one way or the other. Well here's my 2 cents for what it is worth. Yes, I think it is ok for guys just starting out(green guys) to not get paid for a while til they pay their dues and learn how to work (at least partially). Yes, I know there are experienced guys who are willing to work just for the "love of the business" but they shouldn't have to. Yes, I know in most cases promoters don't usually make a lot of money but these guys are still traveling to the shows, they are still getting in there and working and putting their bodies at risk and they deserve to be paid a reasonable amount. It's like that in any other BUSINESS, If McDonalds has a slow week they can't tell all their employees at the end of week, "sorry we didn't make anything this week, we'll try to get you next time". That's bullshit. Also the reason a lot of the towns don't draw anymore is because a lot of cheap ass promoters would rather use green guys who will work for free and set their ring up for them, rather than pay guys who can work. They think they are getting ahead but they just run off the good workers and kill the crowds. If you invest the money in your show to use guys who can work it will pay off in the long run. As for the amount, well that's between the promoter and the wrestler, if they can agree on an amount then that should be fine, and like J.D. said, if you don't get a guarantee and agree to work off the door then your stuck taking what they give you, get a guarantee next time or go somewhere else but don't go on the internet and bitch about it. These guys who piss and moan about "ABCD wrestling doesn't pay me" and sign it 'ABCD Worker'. You know why they don't pay you, cause you put up with it, if everyone left and their were only two or three of them left to work then I guess they'd have to start paying you, and if not go get booked on one of the 2o other wrestling shows in the area. The point is, you don't show up, drop your pants and bend over ,then cry cause you got fucked. Next topic....
Golden Triangle Wrestling- Neil and I decided to go to the GTW show in Montpeliar(sp?) and I have to say, I had a helluva a good time. As J.D. said he was booking the show(kinda) and it was fun to sit in the dressing room and cut up with him and watch him try to book the card and then have the promoter come change it every 5 minutes. It was also fun ragging him about the fact HE was the booker and he was in the opener for the GTW title, and in the main event for the GTW Tag Titles, LOL!! I know, I know it was the promoter's idea. Still funny though. And as he mentioned, it was the grand return of Southern Destruction, not quite what we had planned it to be in the weeks leading up to the 26th, but interesting none the less. We wrestled Mitch Toretta (sp?) and David Andrews. I have to say I was skeptical going in as we were being told that Andrews was over in the babyface dressing room saying he should be the main event and should be going over, and not at all kidding by the way. (there was 50 people there, who gives a shit?) Anyways, then I was told that this Mitch kid was trained by 'Cowboy' Jim, who ain't exactly Dory Funk Jr. by any stretch of the imagination. Well we get out there and David Andrews (in his AJ Styles getup) is still the shits just like the last time I saw him during his claim to fame IWF tenure as Jason Envy. He fucked up everything Neil tried to call for him so we pretty much wrote him off about 2 minutes into it. Mitch Toretta however, albeit green, was good to work with and listened so we kept him in for most of the match, that is untill the clusterfuck of a finish where Andrews fucked up a piledriver nine ways from Sunday. Anyway, we get the pin and go in the back and later find out he was running his mouth off in the other dressing room. I swear, that little bitch better hope I never come across him somewhere at a show, which shouldn't be a problem cause anyone would be retarded to book him, he sucks ass AND he has an ego. Next topic.....
Wrestling in Okolona on December 17th- Looking forward to this show, looks like a great card at the Armory. Besides working, I'm looking foward to seeing a lot of guys that night that I haven't seen in quite some time. Should be a great show. Hope there's a good turnout.
Well that's all for now, in my next update I'll try to talk about some of the other stuff going on in wrestling. As always, thanks for reading and tell a friend.
GENE
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